The Outline

Brandy Jensen

Brandy Jensen
Power Mar 12

NBC must release all 20 seasons of ‘Law & Order’

Under quarantine, the people will be divided into two separate yet equally important groups: Those who know how to handle long stretches indoors, and those who do not. We both need our stories. DUN DUN.

Culture Mar 06

I feel like a failure for wanting to pack up and move home

Should I keep trying to make a life and career in a city I don’t like?

Power Feb 24

We deserve a president who shops at Ross

Paying full retail is for suckers and despots.

Culture Feb 21

My boyfriend shared a private photo of me with his friends

I want to move past this, but is it a giant red flag?

Culture Feb 06

Do I tell my boyfriend I love him even though I’m moving away?

We agreed not to do a long-distance relationship, but I’ve changed my mind about what I want.

Culture Jan 29

British children are haunted

Henry James knew it and now you do too.

Culture Jan 24

I wish my single life was enough for me

How do I learn to love what I already have?

Culture Jan 06

I watched too many videos about cute pigs and now I want to stop eating them

How do I remember to hold the bacon?

Culture Dec 20

I want to forgive my partner for cheating

He denies it even happened, but I can’t stop thinking about it.

Culture Dec 09

Have I been using my depression as a crutch?

I’ve done a lot of work to feel better, but now I’m afraid to fail.

Culture Nov 15

I got my life together and now I’m constantly bored

Is this really what being an adult is like?

Culture Nov 05

Canon fodder

Please, I am begging you, stop telling me which good books are actually bad.

Culture Oct 24

AAFU: I have a crush on an artist I’m bankrolling

How do I ask her out without making things weird?

Culture Oct 11

AAFU: I begrudge my ex her success

Am I a shitty person if I can’t just be happy for her?

Culture Sep 27

AAFU: I’m 23 and have nothing to look forward to

What’s the point when the future seems so bad?

Culture Sep 12

AAFU: How do I save money?

I am finally in a position to get myself out of debt, but I don’t know how to stop spending frivolously.

Culture Aug 29

AAFU: I’m recently separated and scared about dating

How do I broach the topic of my recent marriage with new people?

Culture Aug 15

AAFU: Should I end things with my much-younger partner?

I think it might be better to save ourselves pain in the future.

Culture Aug 01

AAFU: Am I over my ex?

I have a great new relationship, but I am still annoyed when I hear about him.

Culture Jul 11

AAFU: Someone told me my best friend is a rapist

I’ve cut off all contact, but he still wants to know why.

Culture Jun 27

AAFU: How can I stay friends with someone who rejected me?

I know she doesn’t owe me a romantic relationship, but it’s still hard to be around her.

Culture Jun 13

AAFU: I slept with my best friend’s boyfriend

I feel terrible. How do I get her to forgive me?

Culture May 30

AAFU: My brother is dating a teenager

How do I convince him this relationship is inappropriate?

Power May 16

AAFU: I just found out my boyfriend is pro-life

Is this a dealbreaker?

Power May 13

Everything should take 20 minutes

It’s the ideal amount of time for all tasks.

Culture May 02

AAFU: I can’t tell if my wife is depressed or just lazy

She insists everything is fine but I’m not so sure.

Culture Apr 18

AAFU: How do I let go of my marriage?

I want to save our relationship, but I don’t think my wife does.

Culture Apr 04

AAFU: I wish I was closer with my brother

I feel guilty that he seems to be struggling.

Culture Mar 21

AAFU: My friends are hanging out without me

How do I bring this up without sounding petty?

Culture Mar 07

AAFU: My boyfriend of two years ghosted me

How do I get the closure I deserve?

Culture Feb 21

AAFU: Is my brother practicing self-care or just being selfish?

Therapy is great but I worry he is taking the wrong lessons.

Power Feb 13

I can’t tweet for one week and it’s killing me

I can't believe I got put in twitter jail for sharing a good opinion when I have so many bad ones.

Culture Feb 07

AAFU: How do I date after divorce?

My new relationship seems great, but I keep thinking I will make the same mistakes again.

Power Jan 31

Hot chocolate is wasted on children

There are so few (legal, not self-destructive) adult-only indulgences. This should be one.

Culture Jan 23

AAFU: I’ve been lying to my friend

Do I owe her the truth about my new relationship with a man we both know?

Culture Jan 09

AAFU: My work nemesis has cancer

Should I put the past behind us?

Culture Dec 19

AAFU: I’m still in therapy. Should I be dating?

At what point is someone done working on their issues?

Culture Dec 05

AAFU: My housemate’s rude family invaded my home

Can I murder him?

Culture Nov 21

AAFU: I’m ashamed of being so broke

How can I stop comparing myself to my rich sisters?

Culture Nov 07

AAFU: My girfriend’s mother wants a store-bought Thanksgiving

I love to cook, how do we convince her not to bring a turkey?

Culture Oct 24

AAFU: I’m not as smart as everyone said I was

I was a gifted kid, so how do I deal with being an average adult?

Culture Oct 10

AAFU: I don’t have any friends

I just moved to a new city and work all the time. How do I cope with loneliness?

Power Oct 03

Withholding sex from bad men won’t fix anything

Lysistrata my ass!

Culture Sep 26

Dear Fuck-Up: Should I apologize to the women I hurt?

Will it bring them closure or simply reopen old wounds?

Culture Sep 12

Dear Fuck-Up: How do you tell a stranger their partner is cheating?

On when to share a secret.

Culture Aug 29

Dear Fuck-Up: How do I make myself productive?

I’m worried that I am ruining my future.

Culture Aug 24

Armie Hammer could be the world’s most prolific serial killer

Let me explain.

Culture Aug 15

Dear Fuck-Up: How do I tell someone I love them?

And what if they don’t say it back?

Culture Aug 01

Dear Fuck-Up: I feel like I’m falling behind my peers

Is it too late to have the life I want?

Culture Jul 18

Dear Fuck-Up: My boyfriend can’t manage his “anxiety”

Should I try harder to understand him?

Culture Jul 04

Dear Fuck-Up: How do you kindly break up with someone?

Tips for what to do when you know it’s over.

Culture Jun 20

Dear Fuck-Up: How do you live when everything sucks?

It’s bad out there.

Culture Jun 06

Dear Fuck-Up: I don’t think my friend’s chronic illness is real

Is this the end of our friendship?

Culture May 30

Dear Fuck-Up: With special guest Neko Case

Neko Case helps answer a question about the hazards of falling in love online.

Culture May 16

Dear Fuck-Up: I can’t stop mentioning my ex

Is there any way to fully escape your past?

Culture May 02

Dear Fuck-Up: I fall in love too fast

Is there a better way to follow my feelings without getting hurt?

Culture Apr 18

Dear Fuck-Up: I behaved poorly and now I feel bad

A note regarding acceptable behavior

Culture Apr 04

Dear Fuck-Up: I hate my friend’s loser husband

How to tell your best friend she married the wrong guy.

Culture Mar 28

Dear Fuck-Up: Can people change?

This week, a Fuck-Up takes on men with very shady pasts.

Culture Mar 21

Dear Fuck-Up: I feel left out

This week, a Fuck-Up tackles what to do when your friends move on.

Culture Mar 14

Introducing: Ask a Fuck-up

Our new advice columnist refuses to learn from her mistakes, but maybe you can.

Culture Mar 03

Seamless wants to turn you into a sociopath so you order more Seamless

No, Seamless, it’s not cute when someone demands a tiny meal for their hamster.

Culture Jan 24

When is pasta more than pasta?

An instantly iconic ‘Vanderpump Rules’ scene sparks a debate over the words we use to mean “cocaine.”